In the past few days, I have felt a presence that I haven’t in quite awhile. Odin. His presence used to fuel my life in so many ways. The adventures I went on, the things I wrote, some of daily (and weekly!) routines I did were because of Him. Then, when I moved here to this new city and this new land, He disappeared from my life. Not completely at first, but everyday I felt Him less and less. I tried to carry on with my daily rituals for Him. Everyday I’d get up and draw a Rune. I’d read His myths and learn about His adventures, I’d talk to Him and, when it felt right, I’d light a candle for Him. Day by day I felt less and less like He was there or listening. His presence waned until eventually…I felt nothing of Him.
When He left, I missed Him. He’d been with me for so long (5 years I believe it was) and then…nothing. Not only had I left the land in which I’d grown up and everyone I’d ever known, now my Father was gone, too? I hated it, and for awhile I was mad at Him. I know He likes to come and go as He pleases. I just never considered He’d do that with a person He’s claimed as His. Regardless, I moved on. I deepened my practice with my patron Goddess, Brigid, and saw my business take off. I’ve also developed a little bit more of a writing routine and am currently in the midst of several projects (even released a new one on Valentine’s Day!).
Despite all of that, I can’t deny that my heart still missed Odin. I had given up long ago on Him coming back and had just accepted that maybe it was just time for me to move on. Maybe my lessons with Him were complete and now I had new things to learn–things He couldn’t teach me, or that Someone else could teach me better.
Then, the other night, in the midst of a windswept and stormy night, I felt the faintest of stirrings. I climbed the stairs up to my house and, for the first time in several months, I felt Him there with me. It wasn’t the strongest of feelings, but it was enough that I knew He was there. It was welcome and refreshing, just like the storm that was carrying on around me.
Now, a few days later, the storm has passed. My little garden has had a cool drink, and I too have had a refreshing experience. Odin’s presence is getting stronger day by day–I’m feeling Him more and more. It’s not quite as strong as it was before I moved, but if it keeps growing at the rate it Has been then it will be before too long.
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